What to Do When You’re Overwhelmed
Practical steps to overcome it!
Even the most productive and organized amongst us fall into it.
It’s a virtually inescapable part of the human experience.
What is it?
It’s… overwhelm and it can happen in the realm of school, work, health, parenthood, and life in general.
“When we say we're overwhelmed, it's telling our body, “Things are happening too fast, we can't handle them. Shut down. Shut down,” - Brene Brown
When you’re in an overwhelmed state, it’s hard to even see the path forward, never mind take the first step to effectively move forward. You can be stuck and feel like you’re drowning, while simultaneously being amped up and desperately trying to get unstuck.
Overwhelm can happen for many different reasons.
Life poses challenges and changes that can be hard to process and require more time than we’re given
Work can overextend us
The demands on our time and energy can exceed our capacity
And so much more!
There are, however, some definitive steps to take to work your way out of overwhelm and help you navigate back to peace and calm.
This blog will help you take a deeper look at why you get overwhelmed in the first place and what to do about it. I’ll share how overwhelm often comes from issues around control - either a lack thereof or an attempt to overcontrol as well as can stem from misalignments both great and small. If you’re feeling overwhelmed at work, or by life in general, this blog is for you!
How to overcome overwhelm so it doesn’t overcome you
In order to work our way out of overwhelm, we must first understand where it’s coming from so we can overcome it at the root.
In my experience, there are three main causes of overwhelm:
A lack of control
An attempt to overcontrol
A misalignment of (or going against) values, beliefs, or biases
If your overwhelm is coming from a lack of control, it might be due to something tangible such as work or deadlines imposed on you by another that you don’t have control over or it might be due to your own feelings that are causing you to feel a lack of control.
When overwhelm stems from an attempt to overcontrol, it can be due to having had taken on too much responsibility, feeling you need to own and do everything, and an unwillingness to delegate or get help from others.
And when overwhelm comes from misalignment with values, beliefs, or biases, it can result in confusion around feelings and emotions, difficulty processing, and even anger.
In all three of these cases, overwhelm can cause you to feel like throwing your hands up, throwing in the towel, running away, or shutting down.
While it may seem the obvious solution to overcoming overwhelm is to get the thing done and tackled that’s causing the overwhelm… the first step is actually opposite of that.
The first step is to pause and step AWAY from the problem. Take a walk, step out of the office, go sit in your car, hide in the bathroom, go find a quiet space alone free of your phone, computer, or other distractions.
If you can, get honest with yourself and ask, “What’s really going on?”
Is this a lack of control? Is this due to something that goes against your values or beliefs and feels misaligned? Is this your attempt to overcontrol?
Sometimes the simple act of identifying where it’s coming from can calm down the inflammation of overwhelm.
When you’ve given yourself some time away, I always recommend to my clients, if possible to write it out.
This might look like a brain dump of all the things overwhelming you that you have to get done by the end of the week, it might look like a journaling of your feelings and emotions that are overwhelming you, or it might look like listing the things beyond your control in a given situation.
Writing it down can help you to know the next steps to move forward.
With your list, brain dump, journal, etc. ask yourself:
What can I let go of completely? (ie. stress, worry, the client who hasn’t replied to your proposal, sending out holiday cards this year)
What can I delegate? (ie. admin tasks, asking for help with preparing food for a function, getting someone else’s brain on a problem)
What can I do in less than two minutes? (ie. reply to an email, check in on a family member, book a hair appointment)
So often our overwhelm comes from us trying to control too much of what is beyond our control or feeling that the direction we’re headed in is not a match for our values and beliefs.
Are you trying to concretely plan months in advance for something that doesn’t actually need your attention yet?
Have you taken on too much responsibility because you don’t trust anyone else to do it right?
Are you in an organization that doesn’t share the same values as you?
I invite you to approach your overwhelm in a new way by getting honest with yourself and looking at where you can let go, where you can ask for help, and where you might need to walk away.
Then, take a small first step. It could be the first thing on your list, it could be the easiest thing on your list, or it could be the thing you’ve been procrastinating on for years now.
Start.
Two more things to remember when overcoming overwhelm:
Life has seasons. Some seasons are busier than others, some require more from us mentally, physically, and emotionally. Be aware of the season you’re in and recognize overwhelm is a state of being - it’s not permanent or forever or indicative of who you are (unless you choose for it to be). Accept that life happens and you will get through this season.
Learn to put up boundaries and say no when you need to. One thing overwhelm has taught me time and time again is the power of saying “no”. Create a mental filtering system for what you say no to and what you take on to keep your work and life from overwhelming you in the first place. Because staying out of overwhelm to begin with, is a lot easier than climbing out once you find yourself in it.
Remember, we’ve all been overwhelmed at some point or another. We’re human beings. Give yourself grace and rest assured that you’re not broken, weak, or at fault.
Is overwhelm just one of the many areas in which you struggle and could use help in your business or work life?
Want some individual support around exploring your own feelings of overwhelm? I can help!
If you’re looking for a professional business consultant with a qualified and diverse background who listens to your unique problems and engineers effective solutions, I’d love to invite you to book a Discovery Call with me HERE!
My strategic advice and encouragement have helped my clients achieve their goals and make life-changing improvements.
